Chapter 69: Helicopter-Style Hula Dance

Watching the helicopter without its propeller plummet downward, Zhanxiage shook off his empty-loaded self-defense pistol and drew the tiger-tooth combat saber he was carrying.
At this moment, audiences worldwide witnessed a scene they would never forget for the rest of their lives!
Heroic Chinese soldiers, respectable Chinese soldiers, men who make one wonder if they are almost indestructible, inspiring countless young men to emulate and countless young girls to shout wildly, men and men who are pure men...... Zhanxiage was actually swinging his tiger-tooth combat saber, which had drunk countless enemy bloods, wildly waving it in the air. At first, all special forces soldiers around the world stared wide-eyed, hoping to learn a dagger stabbing, from this Chinese soldier who had surprised them so much. But the more they looked, the more confused they became. By the end, as many as 200,000 special forces soldiers worldwide had been watching the incident with wide eyes, each raised their middle finger and uttered a word with different syllables but similar meaning: "Damn!" ”
Just look at the war hero in 'Heroic Singer', where the tiger-tooth combat saber swings back and forth—chaotic, fierce, wild, hysterical, frenzied, and roaring. No matter how you look at it, you can't help but think of a country woman who, in desperation, takes off her shoes and slams a man's head, clutches a kitchen knife, and dares to assault her own thug, risking her life!
"Damn it, damn it! I'll make you follow us every day, strafing fire, bombing, and constantly airdropping soldiers downward! ”
Zhanxiage waved the tiger-tooth combat saber that symbolized the dignity and pride of iron-blooded soldiers, standing on the cliff, jumping, shouting, shouting, "Are you dumbfounded now? We're doomed, we're doomed, we've hit a brick plate, haven't we? None of it was smashed into minced meat or meat patties, but it's going to turn into roast pig, right?!" Hahaha...... You bunch of turtle sons and bastards, I f*** your ancestor Banban Grandma's thirty-sixth-generation banana wax extraction, you old ladies leaning against the wall drinking porridge, despicable, shameless, vulgar, hard, filthy, rotten, all you know is jumping into the graves of the dead, opening the widow's door, planting bombs on buses, drug trafficking, prostitution, gathering gambling, eating at restaurants without paying, saying you're fat and breathing, saying you pee high, you say you didn't use your strength! Actually, you're just a bunch of eunuchs who have long run out of needles. Shouldn't you open your eyes and see carefully? Who am I, brother?! Haha......"
The oral experts responsible for reading the mouth movements and performing live translation were all dumbfounded. In terms of spoken language, they are experts, but they haven't lived in China for seven or eight years. How could they truly understand the rich and colorful use of insults in the Chinese language? How could they possibly let their thinking keep up with the classic formulaic national curses of war heroes, like the flooding of the Yellow River, uncontrollable and unstoppable?!
Staring at the wreckage of a helicopter in the canyon blazing with raging waves, the anger Zhan Xia Ge had built up after being relentlessly hunted for over a month finally vanished. At this moment, he was so overjoyed he could barely contain himself.
At this moment, Zhan Xia Ge made another astonishing move.
He raised the tiger-tooth combat saber above his head with his right hand again, then placed his left hand on a man's crotch. Like a rising flame, he began to twist his body in an almost seductive motion.
At that moment, Zhanxiage's body looked like a constantly trembling snake, twisting in various gentle, teasing, even sexy moves that made one's nose bleed. Although our war hero Ge looked thinner after nearly three months of grueling battle, and his face was still coated with black-green camouflage oil, he had already blended into the rhythm of rising flames, his fart constantly shaking...... Hmm, that noble buttocks are still very sensual.
And his left hand, which was just two centimeters away from a vital spot on his lower abdomen, swung up and down, left and right, making the girls watching on TV—already loyal fans of war heroes—their hearts pounding wildly.
And the tiger-tooth combat saber in Zhanxiage's right hand was ...... Not to mention it.
Who knows if Zhanxiage now imagines it as an essential prop and a virgin assassin when chasing girls...... Roses! The Huya Combat Saber in its master's hand, unwilling to let go, twisted and spun along with him, tracing circles of varying sizes above Zhanxiage's head.
In an information room of the Fifth Special Forces, Principal Zheng Xun found himself on the verge of collapse. He covered his forehead and said in a voice almost groaning, "Can someone tell me what kind of madness this kid is doing right now?!" ”
"Mm......"
Instructor Li Xiangshang cleared his throat and watched the war hero sit there with her eyes closed, twisting her body back and forth. Her face unconsciously showed an expression that could only be described as "lewd." Li Xiangshang said uncertainly, "I think the war hero song is dancing right now...... His own helicopter-style hula dance! If we set aside the erotic lens and interpret it purely by body language, I personally think his constantly writhing body should represent the wreckage of the burning helicopter, and the tiger-tooth combat knife with small circles in his hand might represent the helicopter's smashed propellers, right?! ”
At this point, Instructor Li Xiangshang suddenly shut his mouth, because at that moment, the war hero song was dancing his own helicopter-style hula dance while singing his battle song with absolute pride.
The national TV stations broadcasting this thrilling desert special operations 24 hours a day had their program directors nervously staring at the lip-sync interpreter expert, shouting, "No matter what, you must present exactly what this Chinese soldier is saying right now to every viewer in front of the TV!" Ratings, ratings—that's the essence of this show! ”
The lip-sync interpreter grabbed the microphone, staring intently at Zhanxiage's lips, uncertainly, "He seems to be singing a song!" ”
The program director was on the verge of losing his mind. Ignoring that his voice might be transmitted over the airwaves to all the audience, he slammed the table and shouted, "Don't worry about what he's singing—even if he's singing songs insulting our president, you have to translate it for me!" If you can't do it, then just get lost and go home as soon as possible! ”
"Alright, then I'll give it a try!"
The lip-sync interpreter tried opening his mouth and softly singing, "Oh la la, oh yeah yeah~~~~!! ”
"Pfft......!"
The viewers in front of the TV burst out laughing in amazement. This wasn't singing—it was pure ghostly wailing, a divine chronicle, the strongest howling to the moon.
At this moment, for the sake of their careers and the money in their pockets, those lip-sync translation experts still blushed and continued faithfully delivering the hero's songs to every audience's ear: "Under the bright moon and sparse stars, zombies are on the move, turning the human world into hell. Oh oh, galloping across the martial world, freely roaming heaven and earth, heroes are not afraid of humble origins, their heroic spirit higher than the sky, oh oh, go go go, exhausted, wow woh, oh......
God knows what kind of music he sang, what kind of emotions he wants to express at this moment, and whether he can sing a complete song. Anyway, he closed his eyes there, completely entering a state of self-indulgence and self-admiration. The tiger-tooth combat saber in his hand was swayed faster and faster by him as he sighed, and his hips twisted more and more.
In the end, whether it's kicking it, hula dancing, breakdancing, or Spanish bullfighting dances—whatever Zhanxiage has seen and can twist and mimic a few moves, he performs it all without shame. In the end, Zhanxiage threw off his shirt, completely exposing his chest to the air. He stood on this cliff, striking a move only bodybuilders would use in competition.
Watching Zhanxia Ge's funny, absolutely unacceptable moves, the audience's laughter and smiles suddenly froze.
Under the bright sunlight, they could clearly see Zhan Xiage's skinny yet explosively powerful muscles. What truly moved them and made them respect him once again were the patches of scars on his body—some light, some heavy, some long, some short, densely intertwined.
These wounds included penetrating wounds from bullets, cuts from shrapnel, burns, frostbite, cuts from enemy bayonets, and injuries from falling heavily while dodging bullets......
Some of these scars had already spent quite some time with Zhanxiage. Now, even the scars had fallen off, leaving only faint red marks. But you really didn't need to look closely—you could clearly see these scars, because...... There were so many of them—faint red marks on Zhanxia Ge's chest and back, forming dense nets, so numerous that you simply couldn't ignore them, let alone ignore them.
There were still some scars, fine veins oozing out. Zhanxiage casually wiped them, and a faint bright red rippled across his skin, looking just like a bodybuilder applying oil makeup before going on stage for a competition.
When Zhanxiage stood proudly atop the cliff in the wind, striking an exaggerated bodybuilding pose like a bodybuilder, what burst from his not-so-bulky muscles was the strongest, untainted primal power!
At this moment, looking at the frog-like figure, holding his breath and deliberately puffing up his muscles, and singing the stench of war heroes in the canyon where not a single living person remained, everyone had the same thought: "He really looks so beautiful!" ”